Relationship dating get hurt
Take the time to enjoy each other, living mindfully in the present, within the new boundaries you’ve set.
If you spend the majority of your time rehashing old stories or making this person repeatedly earn your forgiveness, this relationship won’t have a life in the present—it will just be a shadow of the past. It would be far kinder to just set this person free than to stay connected by a pain you refuse to release. People make mistakes, but even the deepest wounds can heal and the most strained relationships can transform.
In my case, I created space to heal and then rebuilt a new, healthier relationship after the dynamics had transformed.
You need to be honest with yourself here: is it really healthy to stay in this situation?
You are allowed to need whatever you need—but it’s crucial that you identify it.
If you know you can’t move on until you receive a thorough confession and apology, but that just isn’t happening, you will set yourself up for pain and unhappiness.
There have been times when I’ve gotten caught up in painful memories instead of being present in the relationship as it is today.
Other times I’ve thought I’ve recognized behaviors reminiscent of the past, and struggled to set clear boundaries for myself.